What Music Means to Me

When I think of music no words can come to mind music and I have a special relationship I go to music for everything its sense of relief and abundance.
Since I was young I felt that I had a special connection to music maybe because my mother used to sing Traditional Somali lullabies not only that she used to sing while cleaning, cooking, happy, or sad but all the time She always forced on speaking to us in the Somali language since we were born and raised in the middle east we never visited out country located in the horn of Africa ( Somalia) Arabic music and Somali music are so different and I love them both since I relate to both but I grew closer to the Arabic music in all its dialects as we know there is more than one dialect we have Hassaniya, Levantine, Hejazi, Najdi, Iraqi, Yemeni. Even though I grew up in Syria and they spoke (Shami) I was and still listen to all dialects as I grew up I started listening to Egyptian music more and soon after Tamer Hosny became one of my favorite artists

Music has always been my to-go too. I listen and sing and release anything negative I feel. 

Some people smoke when stressed, some workout I listen to music and sing as my way of dealing with anything in life. It’s a safe haven. I feel every word and emotion I get goosebumps. It reduces my anxiety.

First time I heard him sing I was around nine years old something about the melody of the music and the words got me it felt like and it still feels like the songs are talking about me in a way I know this might sound strange but I always put his songs on shuffle and the first song that plays talks about exactly what’s going on in my life at the moment and I haven’t experienced that with any artist yet. 

I went to his concert in November, 17,2017 I got VIP tickets to be in the front row this was an uncommon thing because as middle eastern artists they rarely have concerts in the U.S especially having fewer audience compared to having it in the middle east so I had to go and let’s just say I lost my voice that night but it was an experience unlike any other he sang his old hits that brought back so many memories and emotions and he sang new hits that made new memories in all it was one of the best days in my life seeing and feeling it live was much better than hearing and listening from at home.

I remember saving my money months in advance and getting myself prepared i remember changing my clothes 3 times going shopping in and out of stores trying to find the perfect outfit i wanted to feel convertible and confident and of course get his attention which i ended up getting I remember getting there wearing the longest boot/heels i can find to match my mini black skirt i did my hair and makeup in the most extreme way I can do it i put on half of the perfume bottle a dark burgundy lipstick and proceeded Walking in make me so nervous and what shocked me most was as soon as I walked in there was a a music news coverage team by the name of Rotana USA that was covering the event and of course they picked me to talk about the artist the funniest part was that i knew every little thing about Tamer and the interviewer tried to trick me in too different questions and asking about the name of his new songs and me being me i answered and extended by answers with facts scary experience but what a rush it was. 

There was a moment of a weird feeling that I can’t explain once he started singing his old hits. My eyes began to water and I just wanted to cry. Now I am not a sensitive person and I rarely cry in front of people but it felt amazing to let go and be okay with it for once. 

After my emotional experience, he sang a happy song and I reached out. He reached back and shook my hand and smiled as we both continued to sing the lyrics together. 

That was my third concert my first and second were Justin Bieber and Rihanna Being in middle school everyone loved Justin Bieber, Selena, Jones brothers, Miley Cyrus after going through the phase of Hanna Montana which I am so embarrassed to say I became obsessed with Justin just like any teenager was back then from memorizing one time to wish I was the one less lonely, girl 

My first-time experience at a concert with my favorite artist at the time was amazing being there among the crowd made me feel like I belonged and that I was one of the bunch kinda felt like this is my new home but at the end, it is my home I felt and said that proudly I didn’t feel like the new foreign girl who isn’t from here I attend the concert with my friends sang all the songs wore T-Shirts with Justin’s face on them and had root beer one thing I remember was finally feeling the relief of thinking maybe I shouldn’t be here feeling guilty for my friends back home who couldn’t experience this with me.

In middle school, I use to force my teachers to call me Mrs. Bieber you may laugh but it was the cool thing to do then some teachers would laugh and try to just ignore it and some would get me gifts or be creative in a way for me to do my work, for example, I use to hate math and my math teacher got me a book full of math material that has Justin Bieber pictures all over it after that no one could tell me that music doesn’t affect our lives because it does in many ways. 

The second concert I was so excited about as well it was a gift from one of my friends as a birthday gift I was in love with Rhiana’s music at that period and still to this day but it was something about her music and her energy and being related to her not only her music but also her style her charisma and the way she carries herself I remember finishing my shift at Rainbow clothing store and rushing in the car to go to the concert listening to her music on the way made the excitement rise, even more, we got there and danced and sang and took pictures and videos it was a night I will never forget. My life now is a mixture of all three and more expanding my taste of music and learning about different cultures. One thing I know for sure is that wherever I go music will go with me.

When I say Mixture of music I mean what I listen to from day to day I didn’t mention this but I also grew up listening to Indian music my mom and dad were a big fan of Bollywood movies and songs so that is also embedded in my head from Kal Ho Naho , kush kush hota hay, and the iconic kabhi khushi kabhi gham. Amazing movies and music that still to this day my family listens to what I mean by the mixture are some days I wake up and listen to English music and some days Spanish from Nicky Jam to Celia Cruz .

I even started listening to Afro-beat music that my sister loves artist like wiz kid and P-Square

One of the newest additions to my music taste is Albanian music by new artists like Dhurata Dora, Soolking, and one of my favorite Elvana Gjata. 

Even though I don’t speak Spanish nor Albanian i still love to listen and learn music makes me somehow give me a window into the culture it doesn’t matter if we speak the language or not what matters is the feeling a sense of belonging and most importantly coming together as humans by sharing the music of our culture. 

Some of my favorite artist

Tamer Hosny “Arrab Kaman” Egyptian